I'm sorry everyone ...but I have to post this. This may be the last I hear of him. Just like Chelsea ..<br><br>This was an email from Framer to me about what was bothering him. Please take the time to read it. I'm posting it unedited.<br><br>sis this is the way things have ben and this is what I have ben having trubel whit and this is what have made me be awake all nights.... <br>And this is why I havent ben writing to you.... I am sorry but when you have read this poem I know this friendship we got will be over so I take my leav now.... <br>Godby forever and may the light go whit you.... <br>*cryes and walks of* <br><br><br><br>I don't know what is going on whit my mind I cant control it any more.... <br>I cant hide my feelings forever but I cant tell you eider what it is becores I know it will hurt..... <br>And I don't want you to feel that pain agen that you ones have done before even if I am not like other peppol I know that I wold hurt you and that I cant take it then I rader hurt myself instead of hurting you..... <br>I cant lose you like my friend and I cant live whiteout of you.... <br>I am really happy whit things the way they are but my hart want something ells but I am holding it back from you and I am taking control over it and when I do I will destroy it so I wont happened agen.... <br>You don't need to worry you don't need to se the things I will do to myself to get write of this feeling that I have.... <br>You are free from gilt and I wont blame you for this it is all my fault don't worry you are free from all the blame.... <br>I don't know what I can do to stop this feeling but it is going berserk right now but I tried to fight it..... <br>But I am noting more then a soldier that have fallen on the fields of war in this fight I cant do anything any more then pray that my sense takes over and stop this maddens that is lose in my body..... <br>One part of me wanton tell you what it is but the other part of me knows it will hurt you and there for not tell you what it is.... I know that it hurts to but not that much like the thing the other side wanton tell you will.... <br>I really is losing control now I cant help it and nothing seems to work to get over it..... <br>OH gud why....? <br>You have woken up a amazing feeling in me that I belive was dead for a long time ago..... <br>Only this time it will hurt more..... <br>And that is it not sopuce to do.... <br>The inside of me is on fire and I cant take control over it..... <br>I wish that I cold but I cant.... <br>I know that this feeling is in wain and that it will bring sadness to you but my stupid hart wont se that..... <br>I belive that you have figured out what I am talking abut around now so I will say it out clearly..... <br>I love you..... <br>Yes I love the personality you have I love your spirit I love everything abut you.... I cant help myself but I wish that I cold.... <br>Don't worry I completely understand whatever you do now when you have read this don't worry I almost know what you will do.... But I only wanton say that I am sorry for this I really am I couldn't stop myself I couldn't get write of this feeling for you.... <br>I am sorry.... you don't need to worry I will take my leave and I wont bather you any more..... I know that I have put fire to and sunk this "ship" also..... <br>But plz lets go separate ways like friends.... I don't wanton fight against you.... I didn't want this but my hart toke over and I couldn't stop it I am sorry..... <br><br>*turns my back against you and slowly walks away crying.... away to my old friend darkness that is waiting for me....* <br><br>I coldent se what I was doing....<br>But now I can se hove that we ones hade is dying and it is all my fault....<br>Dont worry I already know what you are thinking dont worry you dont need to explain yourself to me....<br>I already know what you will say....<br>So plz dont say anything you dont really mean I know wear I have whent whit this and I know that it is far over the line....<br>I cant beliv that this is the end and that I am leting go of you now this is the worst think that ever have happend to me....<br>You dont need to tell me your reasons dont worry I already know....<br>You dont need to talk to make me understand wear this is going....<br>I know that I have screw things up for you and that I have made things wores for you and ben giving you more pain and for that I am sorry...<br>But now is it time for me to let go of you all....<br>I cant se myself in the mirror any more....<br>The only thing I se when I look into the mirror is the scum of the earth....<br>This is the the post that I wish that I never wold be posting the final and last one but it is only for your best....<br>I can hear and feel hove my body and my mind is screaming to me telling me hove big scum I have ben when I did this to you.....<br>Well this is the final mail fron me and I dont know what to say... I cant think like I never have ben abel to do....<br>My mind whont stop screaming to me it whont stop calling me scum of the earth....<br>Why am I telling you this...? <br>you dont need any more pain then I already have ben giving you....<br>You really dont need to se this mails... <br>So why am I doing this....?<br>Is it the reason that I am to stupid to understand that you dont whanto write to me ever agen....<br>Or is it that I feelt that I needed to say this befor I will go down the road doing 200 km/h....?<br>Well I dont know this isent what I wanted not by a long shot....<br>Gud I really screwd up this time... <br>Well this is goodby forever....<br>I cant stay to know hove motch I have hurt you and to know that I still will be doing if I stay...<br>Well goodbye plz tell bro this I cant do it I am sorry I dont know why I am asking this las favor fron you but I do....<br>This is it.... this is the last time you ever will get a mail fron me.... If you whanto say anything is tomorow your last chanse <br>after 00:00 (12 in the night) tomorow I will be going down a road doing 200 so you wont have a chanse of contakting me after that why I belive you<br>wold whanto do that.... well this is goodbye....<br>Bye forever sis (plz let me call you that for the last time now)<br>*Walks into the darkness and what you can hear am I also crying ... The sound of a sport care is possibel to hear fron the darkness*<br> <br> <br>********<br>And now you know that girls are truly the cruelest creatures that ever existed. Even when they would never in their wildest dreams wish this. I'm so sorry. I just wanted to be a friend, and a sister. <br> <p><!--EZCODE HR START--><hr /><!--EZCODE HR END--><!--EZCODE CENTER START--><div style="text-align:center"><!--EZCODE LINK START--><a href="http://villageanime.com"><!--EZCODE IMAGE START--><img src="http://www.villageanime.com/zoids/rpg/Ryokoback.jpg" style="border:0;"/><!--EZCODE IMAGE END--></a><!--EZCODE LINK END--></div><!--EZCODE CENTER END--><!--EZCODE BR START--><br /><!--EZCODE BR END--><!--EZCODE CENTER START--><div style="text-align:center"><!--EZCODE BOLD START--><strong>"Say it to my gun barrel, you jerk!"<!--EZCODE BR START--><br /><!--EZCODE BR END-->- Raven, Zoids Guardian Force<br><!--EZCODE BR START--><br /><!--EZCODE BR END--><!--EZCODE LINK START--><a href="http://pub49.ezboard.com/banimecommunity71285">AnimeCommunity</a><!--EZCODE LINK END--><!--EZCODE BR START--><br /><!--EZCODE BR END--><!--EZCODE LINK START--><a href="http://pub92.ezboard.com/bmidnightlagoonmessageboard">Midnight Lagoon</a><!--EZCODE LINK END--></strong><!--EZCODE BOLD END--></div><!--EZCODE CENTER END--></p><i></i>

You don't need to be sorry RM. You were only following your heart and trying to be a friend for someone who desperately needs one.<br><br>If you're out there and see this Framer, I know that the last time you felt close to someone like this, it ended very tragically and painfully. But it won't happen that way this time. Please reconsider what you are planning to do. The darkness may seem very great and powerful, but you don't have to face it alone. You have a lot of friends here - RM, DF, and myself and many others. We will be here for a while anyways, so remember that we are available to discuss anything that you want to. <p><center><a href="http://pub49.ezboard.com/banimecommunity71285"><img border="0" src="http://users.adelphia.net/~henheart/images/ruri4.jpg" alt="banimecommunity71285" width="384" height="199"></a><br><b><a href="http://pub49.ezboard.com/banimecommunity71285">Anime Community</a> Where Luna's Body Went</b><br><b><a href="http://pub92.ezboard.com/bmidnightlagoonmessageboard">Midnight Lagoon</a> Tenchi Muyo!</b></center></p><i></i>

FRAMER...Why couldn't I help? I only wish I could have done more for you.............. <p><!--EZCODE CENTER START--><div style="text-align:center"><!--EZCODE IMAGE START--><img src="http://www.hostmysig.com/data/docsfox/sunset.JPG"/><!--EZCODE IMAGE END--></div><!--EZCODE CENTER END--></p><i></i>

I saw that this poll was opend I dont minde it really but I came her to say that none of you cold have done anything abut this you really coldent.... Dont blame yourself.... I chose not to tell any one of you befor it was to late to do anything abut it..... Like you maby se now I am okay but I hafto explain to the owner of the car hove I cold let the cops take a car worth 2 miljon whitout doing anything.... Well that is a later problem.....<br>And all of you did help me today.... When I was sitting in the car doing 200 - 220 I was thinking on all of you .... and what I was doing right then.... I have all of you to thanks for me being her right now it was you all that made me change my mind abut things......<br>And DOCS dont worry I chose not to tell you so you coldent do anything you dident know what was going on and for that am I sorry....<br>And Sis (if it is okay if a call you that) I am really sorry for puting you trough this I have ben told that you was really sad when you got to know this and you dont know hove sorry I am for doing this and to put you trought this.... And girls isent crule it was my mind that snapt it was not your fault and dont tell yoursel that you was the reson for it.... <br>For you was not the reson I did this it was old memoris waking up agen in my mind that made me snap....<br>But what happend is that I feelt the same feeling that I did whit my previes girl friend and that started a chain reaktion in my mind that I coldent control and it whent berserk.... <br>I am reganing control over myself sligtly but it may take some time befor I well be okay agen....<br>So you mayby whont se me her att the board in some time but I will be okay... give me time and I will trye to get over it....<br>But dont worry I will fix this....<br>And plz dont blame yourself for this it wasent your fault any of this things it was 100% my own fault this..... you dident have anything to do whit it I acted all by myself.....<br><br>And MJH thanks for talking whit me on msn you made me rethink some things in my life.... <br> <p>Nemo ante mortem batus </p><i>Edited by: <A HREF=http://pub19.ezboard.com/btenchimuyo79943.showUserPublicProfile?gid=framer@tenchimuyo79943>FRAMER</A> at: 1/10/03 1:53:42 pm<br></i>